Maria - I like it loud

Hmm. I havent really slept much. 3 hours or so. I really do feel terrible. Its just something happaned last night, and I dont know if its due to that but I acted very unfair. Anyway, blablabla, two reasons two why I couldnt sleep. I felt terrible over how I acted, and I kept seeing the face of a man everywhere. Creepy as hell. When I finally convinced myself there cant be just the face of a man everywhere, I had the other problem left. Feeling terrible and panicky over how I acted and what consequences it might have. Try to deal with that one...

I decided I had to keep my mind at ease and focused on something else til I was tired enough to just not be able to keep my eyes open. Riiiight...

The only thing I found working was The Big Bang Theory. I tried reading, music, radio. Nothing worked. The problem is, its more or less impossible to fall asleep while watching that. It is possible, yes, but last night was not one of those nights. As soon as I thought 'better go to sleep now' and turned it off my heart started beating harder and harder and I had troubles breathing. So, more Big Bang, felt ok, then same thing over and over again.

Last time I looked at the clock was at 6 am this morning. I got up at 9 am. I am tired, and its impossible to sleep. This will be a long, long day...

I really hope I will feel better soon too. This is not a fun feeling to walk around having. Blueh!