Maria - I like it loud

Im not in a good mood. I can feel it the whole time, the worrying, burning feeling in the heart area. The big knot in the tummy. The empty mind. Knowing my mind is totally occupied subconciously with worrying. Every now and then it comes back to tell me whats wrong, and lets me think about it. The it goes back to the subconcious.

And left is me. Worried. Sad. Prolly a very very very boring person to be around right now.

I dont know why it makes me so sad. Yeah, I might not be able to go see Liam. Its not the end of the world. The volcano will calm down (BUT WHEN??). And theres still time. But baby, Im the worrying kind. It doesnt matter what people say, it doesnt help. Let me be worried and sad.




Now, something that makes me sad is the idiotic jokes 'friends' are making about it. I really cant believe how some of you guys have treated me the last few days. A friend of yours is sad, worrying, crying, cant sleep. No not all due to the volcano, but thats what its focused at. And you have been making fun of me. Fun of my feelings. Fun of the fact I cant go see the person I love. Do you realise how much you have hurt me? I never thought anyone could be so heartless. I told you I didnt find it fun and you still continued.

Yes, I have been very hurt, and I still dont know what to think about it. BUt just so you know, I wouldnt ever make any sngle joke to anyone thats so sad over something. Its just not ok. Im really disappointed. Friends are supposed to be there for when times are rough, no matter reason. When did it get ok to mock the weak and sad? Just cause something isnt bothering you doesnt mean it is the same for me.

So, without further notice, if I dont reply to you on facebook or msn, there are two reasons;

1. I dont feel like it, dont know what to reply, or just havent seen it or had the time.
2. You are a fucking idiot who made fun of my feelings and I really dont want to talk to you.


Its up to each and every one of you to guess which one you belong to.